With all that's been going on at the office lately, the interns at BradParksBooks.com have decided enough is enough: We need some reinforcements.
So we have set about hiring a new internand, yes, we're inviting you to apply (but, since we want to trick you into reading this entire message, which is filled with interesting news, we're going to make you wait all the way until the end of this rambling missive to get the details).
We're excited about our pending arrival and must have been talking about it a little too loudly the other day, because Brad looked up from his workhe's doing final edits on EYES OF THE INNOCENT, the much-awaited sequel to FACES OF THE GONEand asked us what was going on.
"We need some extra hands around here," said Sarah, the smart intern. "We're tired of being overworked."
"Overworked?" Brad objected, then gestured toward Peter, the slothful intern. "He plays Mafia Wars on Facebook all day long!"
"Not true," Peter replied. "I've switched to Farmville."
Brad pointed at Zach, the silly intern: "And he spends all day thinking of fart jokes."
"Hey, what do you call someone who doesn't fart in public? A private tutor!" Zach replied. "Get it? Tutor!? Like tooter, only..."
Zach kept talking, but Sarah ignored him, laying out her argument that the burgeoning Carter Ross franchise will require more manpower in the coming months, pointing out the rash of recent developments:
In addition, Sarah pointed out there have been several upcoming appearances added to Brad's touring schedule:
Friday, April 16, 7 p.m.
Saturday, May 1, 4 p.m.
Tuesday, May 25, 7 p.m.
Sarah continued her argument: "New books, new appearances, audio books, paperbacks... there's too much to keep track of for the three of us. Especially with Peter distracted by his watermelons."
"Watermelons?" Brad said.
"Yeah, Farmville. Remember?"
Brad just grumbled and went back to work, but we're assuming he will eventually see things our way. (We'll start "forgetting" to stock the office fridge with Coke Zero if he doesn't).
Want to be considered for the job? E-mail a really impassioned argument as to why you should be the newest BradParksBooks.com Intern to firstname.lastname@example.org. We'll announce the new hire in an upcoming issue of The Scoop: The Official Newsletter of the Carter Ross Fan Club.
Or, failing that, you can always send a fart jokeZach loves them. Either way, we look forward to hearing from you.
The Interns at BradParksBooks.com