With exactly one month to go before the release of the breakout thriller Say Nothing, the offices of BradParksBooks.com were thronging with activity.
Sarah, the smart intern, was proofreading the press release that would be part of a major media blitz.
Peter, the slothful intern, was working his way through a box of paperclips, bending them to resemble tiny, stainless steel X-wing fighters.
And, in honor of the now-finalized Say Anything Tour, Zach, the silly intern, was desperately trying to memorize the Lloyd Dobler I'm Just Gonna Hang With Your Daughter monologue ("I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career," etc.).
In the midst of all that important work, the Author Himself was making rounds in the intern cubicles, thrusting a prototype of the Say Nothing dust jacket at whoever he could find.
"Feel it," he kept saying. "It's puffy."
Once he reached the last cubicle, he stopped in the middle of the room and stroked the paper in a trance-like state of bliss. "Puffy," he said.
Then he started over again.
"Why does he keep doing this?" asked Maggie, the clueless intern, as Brad completed his third lap.
"The dust jacket. It has embossed letters," Sarah explained. "Brad's been dreaming about a cover with embossed letters for as long as he's been writing. The only thing is, he doesn't call it 'embossed,' he calls it—"
"Puuuuuff-ffeeeeee," Brad cooed. "Pretty pretty puffy letters."
With Brad otherwise distracted, this seems like a good time to take care of some business. If you are not near one of the stops on the Say Anything Tour (or you just don't feel like putting up with Brad in person, which the interns totally understand), you can still get your very owned signed, personalized copy of Say Nothing mere days after it releases.
If Brad should happen to spend part of the broadcast stroking his new book cover, the interns assure you he'll stop. Eventually.
Then again, they've been wrong before.
The BradParksBooks.com Interns
You can also pre-order unsigned copies of Say Nothing from: